


Loving You is a Losing Game

by remysratcolony9



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Angst, Behavioral Analysis Unit (Criminal Minds), F/M, Fluff, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-09
Updated: 2021-03-02
Packaged: 2021-03-13 16:53:46
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 17
Words: 14,540
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28656777
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/remysratcolony9/pseuds/remysratcolony9
Summary: Reader meets Spencer at a coffee shop while waiting for her friend Luke. What's the worst that could happen?(I'm so sorry for the short summary, I'm just not the best at them.)
Relationships: Spencer Reid/Reader, Spencer Reid/You
Comments: 5
Kudos: 36





	1. A Chance Meeting

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! Thank you so much to the two people reading this <3 As you can tell, this is my fist fic but I've had everything besides the beginning planned out for months. Anyway, here I am finally posting what I have so far and I hope you like it.

You woke up in an unfamiliar apartment. Bookshelves lining the interior walls, dim lighting, and dark furniture. The previous night's events and your headache then hit you.

Two Weeks Earlier...

It was a Wednesday, the day you and your closest friend, Luke, always grabbed breakfast together. Waiting on him, you walked inside and got in line to order your coffee, as well as his, before placing your things down at the table.

Getting up to add more sugar into your coffee, you almost bump into someone. "I'm so sorry!", the tall stranger with wavy brown hair said frantically. "Did I spill any coffee on you?".

"No you're good don't worry", you smiled at him. "I haven't seen you before and I come here every week, what's your name?".

"It's Spencer", he said smiling back. "And yours?"

"Y/n". As soon as you were about to continue the conversation, Spencer received a phone call and stepped away for a moment, flashing you an apologetic smile.

"Reid we have a case in Miami, and it's not a pretty one. Pack your bags professor", said Garcia on the other end of the line.

Spencer came back over to you and apologized, explaining that he was just called in by his job. "It was great meeting you y/n", he said.

"Same to you Spencer", you said, extending your hand towards him.

Not meeting your hand, Spencer said, "You know, the number of pathogens passed during a handshake is staggering. It's actually safer to kiss".

"Is that so? Well, here's my number. Maybe when you get back in town we can hang out some time", you said.

"I'd like that", he smiled and walked out of the coffee shop.

Feeling a buzz in your pocket, you pulled out your phone.

It was a text message from Luke, "Sorry y/n, I was about to get there when I got called in by my job. Call you when I'm back home."

You were slightly annoyed but understood how unpredictable his job could be at times. "No problem Luke, talk soon :)", you responded.


	2. Night Out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! I'm a bit confused on how to post here so if something looks odd, that's why lol. Thank you for reading :)

A week had gone by and you were beginning to think that Spencer wasn't going to call you. You kept telling yourself that it was because he was still away at work. At least that's what you hoped for.

Hopping in the shower, you got a text from Luke.  
"Y/n, we just got back in town. Want to grab some coffee tomorrow?"

"That's great, and of course :)", you replied.

After your shower, you got dressed and put on AHS. Hours had gone by before you knew it.

Reid's POV:  
The case was a hard one. There had been children involved, but luckily we caught the Unsub.

"Now I think tonight calls for some drinks", said Rossi.

"AGREED!", Emily, Tara and Garcia said in unison.

JJ then said she had dinner planned with Will and the kids, and that she would join us next time, Matt saying the same.

"Luke? Reid? You guys coming?", Tara said.

After ten minutes of trying to convince me, I caved in and agreed to go.

Two hours had passed at the bar and I realized I still hadn't reached out to y/n. Checking my phone, I saw her contact and couldn't help but smile. I would call her when I got home tonight.

"REEID!", Garcia said drunkenly. "Who has you smiling like that? Tell me right now or I'll find out myself tomorrow when I don't see three of you".

"Does Reid have a little girlfriend?", teased Luke.

"No, it's none of your business. She's a girl I met at a coffee shop last week. That's all I'm sharing."

I heard my phone chime right after speaking. It was a text... from y/n.

"Hi y/n, are you busy?", was sent from my phone.

"Hey stranger! No, why?", she texted back.

"Would you want to come over and watch a movie next week?"

"Sounds good, when?"

"Tuesday at 8?"

"See you then :)"

I panicked as soon as I saw these texts, knowing for a fact I hadn't sent them. *GARCIA*

"Why did you send this Garcia? How did you even figure out the correct contact, that's disregarding my privacy".

"Loosen up Junior G-Man. Accept my gift and go watch that movie with her on Tuesday", she replied smiling.

I said goodbye to her and the rest of the team, heading back to my apartment.

A week had passed by and it was now Tuesday. I had been working as usual, also texting y/n and getting closer with her as time progressed.

I set out a few movie options and checked to see if I had any popcorn, when I heard a knock at the door.

It was y/n.


	3. Solaris

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! I just wanted to quickly mention that I first uploaded the fic on Wattpad and have up written to chapter 9 there but I'll try to put them on here this weekend while I'm writing chapter 10. Thank you :)

Y/n POV:  
Walking up to Spencer's apartment, you felt nervous. He seemed shockingly forward last week, his first text to you asking if you wanted to go to his apartment and watch a movie with him. You weren't complaining though.

You knocked three times and waited. Spencer opened the door and lead you inside. He offered you a drink and showed the movies he had set out as options.

You chose Solaris and laid back on the couch, waiting for him to come back with the bowl of popcorn. He sat down next to you. "Do you understand Russian?".

"No, why?", you replied.

"The movie is entirely in Russian but don't worry. I can simultaneously whisper translate while we watch it."

"Sure", you said flashing him an embarrassed smile.

The movie was halfway through and you could feel yourself jolting awake every few minutes. Reid was still watching it, his translation making you more tired than you had already been.

You woke up confused. Your memory wasn't the best so it took you a moment to piece together that you were in Spencer's apartment. Turning in your phone, you checked the time. It was 3am.

Spencer walked into the living room after just exiting the shower. "Hey, you're awake!", he said smiling. "You fell asleep in the middle of the movie and I didn't want to wake you."

"Thanks", you said. "I should really get going, seeing it's past midnight already. Sorry for staying this long."

"You're fine don't worry. I would rather you not leave my apartment at three in the morning, you have no idea what kind of people are out there driving right now", he said. "I'll sleep on the couch and you can take my bed."

"Spencer no, I wouldn't want to impose. It's your bed. I'll take the couch, it's fine."

"Y/n, I'm not going to let you sleep on the couch"

"Okay Spencer, thank you", you said, giving him a tired smile as you walked out of the living room.

You entered his bedroom and were about to go to sleep when you realized your outfit wasn't exactly comfortable enough to sleep in. Awkwardly stepping back into the living room, you asked Spencer if you could wear some of his clothes to sleep.

He said yes and you thanked him and said goodnight. After changing into a pair of his joggers and a loose shirt, you went to bed.

Waking up to the sound of Spencer on the phone, you could vaguely hear a voice on the other end. "Come on man. I'm telling you, let me set you up with my friend you guys would be perfect together."

Minding your own business you walked away. You knew you had met Spencer not too long ago but you could see yourself getting closer with him. You were unsure, but it did hurt a bit to think of him being with someone who wasn't you. 

After what felt like an eternity, he got off the phone and you walked into his kitchen, pretending you hadn't heard the conversation. "Good morning Y/n. I would have made breakfast but I'm not exactly the best cook", he said while flashing his awkward smile. "I can order us something if you'd like?".

"Um, I'm actually okay", you said. "Thank you so much though. I had fun watching the movie with you last night".

"Up until the part where you fell asleep", he said teasingly.

"Yeah, yeah", you responded. "For real though, thank you. I have to go home but I hope we can make plans again soon so just let me know when you're free".

You walked towards the door, planting a kiss on his cheek and waving goodbye.


	4. The Date

You sat in the coffee shop waiting for Luke, the memory of meeting Spencer replaying in your head. You had only been able to hang out out a few more times after movie night due to his job but were still growing closer. You pulled out your phone and decided to text him and ask if he wanted to come over tonight.

Luke walked in, sitting down after you hugged. You handed him his coffee and started chatting. "So Y/n", he said. "Anyone special in your life right now, 'bestie'?"

"Stoppp! Please don't say that word again", you said laughing. "And uhm no why? I'm curious now."

"I might or might not have a certain co worker that I think would be perfect for you"

"Who? Emily", you replied jokingly. "Say less".

"Very funny Y/n. I was actually thinking Reid?"

"I don't think I know him. The only time I met your coworkers was somewhere halfway through your first year at the BAU. Either way, I kind of have my eye on someone right now but I'll let you know."

"Okay okay, fair enough"

We caught up for a while longer, eventually saying our goodbyes and going back to our respective apartments.

On your way home you got a call from Spencer.

"Hey Y/n. I'm glad you messaged me, I was actually about to text you myself. It's okay if you say no but... I was wondering if you would want to go out with me tonight?"

Internally screeching, you asked him the time and place and then hung up after talking for a bit.

You were sitting on the couch watching Netflix when you heard a knock at the door. You opened the door to find Spencer standing there. "Hey Y/n, are you ready?"

"Yea, just give me a second to grab my jacket."

You got to the Italian restaurant and sat down, talking with Spencer.

"How was your week?", he said.

"It was alright. Pretty boring because we couldn't hang out. I got a lot of work done though. Yours?"

"I could more or less say the same. My week was decent. Don't get me wrong, I love my job, but traveling so often can be a bit much."

"Where do you work?"

The waiter came to your table with the check. You tried to get Spencer to let you pay for half of it but he insisted he would pay.

After paying, you took the metro with Spencer. You both walked into your apartment complex and realized that the other also lives there.

"How have I not seen you? That's rather interesting", you said.

"Yeah, I'm surprised we never saw each other here all of this time."

"Well I guess this gives us an excuse to hang out more often", you said, playfully winking at him.

He walked you to your apartment, which just so happened to be directly above his. You were about to go inside when he called your name. Turning around, he then pulled you in for a kiss and you reciprocated.

"Thank you so much for tonight Spence. It was great. I'm really tired but we can talk tomorrow", you said smiling and waving goodbye as you entered your apartment.


	5. Smithsonian

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun Fact: As I was writing this I discovered that a spider had been living in my room for a week because I thought it was a speck of dust. Anyway ty for reading :)

Two months had gone by and Spencer had taken you on two more dates around town. You were beginning to harbor feelings for him, knowing that it was ridiculous if you tried to ignore them.

Spencer had texted you, asking if you wanted to go to the Smithsonian National Museum of Natural History with him. You agreed, of course, heading downstairs to his apartment. The two of you walked to the metro station and he grabbed you by the hand, leading you to the correct train.

Walking around the museum, Spencer would point at random artifacts and go on about the history behind them.

During one of these rants, you leaned in and kissed him, interrupting his fact.

Shocked at first, he reciprocated the kiss.

Still blushing you asked, "How do you know so much about all of this?"

"Well, I guess I can accredit that to the fact that I'm a certified genius", he smirked playfully.

If it were anyone else, you would have been irritated by this, but it was Spencer.

The night went by in no time and after grabbing a quick meal, you two headed back to your apartment complex. 

"Thanks for coming with me tonight Y/n. I had a great time".

"Of course, I had a great time too", you smiled.

You got out of his car and walked back to his apartment. He held the door open for you and went back to lock it.

You had been trying to build up the confidence to kiss him the entire date and once you did it it you felt calm again, that was until you had arrived at his apartment of course.

Sitting down next to you on the couch, both of you made awkward eye contact for a moment until you said, "Would you want to..."

Spencer pulled you into his room and you laid on his bed. He straddled you and started to kiss down your neck.

You let out a small moan. He chuckled and continued kissing his way down. He reached your underwear and stared up at you. You desperately nodded at him to continue.

He pulled them off and started kissing you. You pushed him down on the bed, taking off his. You placed your hand around his dick and sunk your head downwards, taking him in. He moaned in response sinking his back lower on the headboard.

Now pushing your head further down, he came a few moments later and you swallowed. He then flipped you over, once again kissing downwards. Grabbing his dick, he teased you and then thrusted inside you, rubbing your clit. You both came down from your highs a few moments later.

"So...", you said awkwardly after walking back into the living room with him. "Thanks again, I should be heading back upstairs soon."

"You don't have to leave right now, we could watch some Dr. Who re-runs for a bit if you want", he said.

You chuckled and sat down next to him, watching TV and quickly falling asleep.

After the episode ended, he noticed you were sleeping. He grabbed a blanket and placed it over you and then headed back to his room to sleep.


	6. Burnt Breakfast

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! Thank you so much for 200 hits <3

Once again, you woke up in Spencer's apartment, the smell of burnt food consuming it entirely.

You raised your head up from the couch to see an awkwardly smiling Spencer standing next to what you had correctly assumed to be burnt pancakes.

"I'm uh, really sorry about that Y/n. I'm not exactly the best chef but I tried to make you breakfast and..."

Shutting him up with a kiss on the cheek, you said, "It's okay, really. Don't worry, it's the thought that counts. I can just order some breakfast."

The food arrived soon after and you two began to eat, losing track of time.

"So... last night. Would you mind if we talked about it?", he said.

"I mean, I don't know about you but I enjoyed myself. I wouldn't mind doing that again if you were on the same page of course."

He responded by leaning in to kiss you when all of a sudden his front door opened.

"Reid! Where are you? You're late for work and Prentiss was worried so she sent me to come and get you."

Standing in the doorway was none other than your best friend, Luke Alvez.

Both of your eyes widened.

"Luke" "Y/n", you said in unison.

"You two know each other?", Spencer said.

"And they call you a genius?", Luke joked.

"WAIT... how did I not realize he was the 'pipe cleaner/genius' from your job that you were trying to set me up with?"

"I have no idea either", Luke said. "So how do you two know each other Y/n?"

"He's actually my uh boyfriend".

Spencer gave you a confused stare for a second but began to play along. It came out of your mouth without a thought and you just hoped you hadn't scared him away.

"Look at you Reid, finally getting the girl. She's like a sister to me though and a great person as well so if you hurt her I will not hesitate to hurt you back."

Laughing awkwardly, Spencer said, "Thanks Luke, I got the message."

You checked the time on your phone and saw that half an hour had gone by, adding on to his already being late.

"You should get going before your boss decides to fire you."

"Oh shit. Reid let's go. I'll wait for you in the car, hurry up."

You stood there for a moment, staring at each other in slight confusion.

"I promise once we get back from the case I'll explain it all and why I didn't tell you. I'm sorry Y/n".

"It's okay, don't worry. We'll talk later like you said."

Walking outside, you placed a chaste kiss on his lips and waved goodbye.

It was two in the morning when you were awoken by the ringing of your phone. It was Spencer.

"Hey 'Reid'. Why are you calling me right now?"

"I apologize, I forgot about the time difference between Virginia and California, which is ironic considering I have an eidetic memory. I'm rambling on sorry, I was having trouble sleeping and just wanted to talk with you."

"Awe, well I'm still tired but I can try to stay awake and talk with you"

"Thank you Y/n", he said.

"So why does Luke call you Reid, like is everyone at the BAU on a last name basis?"

"For the most part yes. I mean one of my coworkers calls me Spence but we've known each other for over ten years and are pretty close. So um yeah it's mainly a last name basis there."

"Oh okay", you said yawning.

"This is a bit random but, you know... when you told Luke I was your boyfriend, I sort of liked the sound of it."

A soft snore escaped your lips, you had fallen asleep.

He gave a small smile and hung up the phone, letting you sleep.

Three weeks later, Spencer called and told you that he had just gotten back from the case.

New Text Message From Spencer Reid

Hi Y/n, I was wondering if you would want to come over tonight.

Of course! Time?

7:30 PM?

See you then 'Reid' ;)

A few hours had gone by and you got ready to head downstairs to his apartment.

You knocked on his door and he let you in, offering you something to drink.

He gave you your water and you sat on the couch watching a nature documentary.

Once it ended, he started up a conversation. "Remember when Luke asked how we knew each other and you said I was your boyfriend? I might have liked the sound of that and was wondering if you would want to be my girlfriend."

"Don't doubt yourself Spencer, of course I would want to", you said kissing him on the lips.

He kissed you back, grabbing your arm and pulling you into his bedroom.


	7. Phone Calls

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I'm almost halfway through writing chapter eleven :)

Reid pushed you onto the bed, kissing from your lips downwards. He went to pull down your bottoms and stared up at you, asking for consent. You leaned over to kiss him and he pulled them off.

"You're already so wet for me Y/n", he said.

You moaned in response.

He started kissing upwards from your thigh, stopping right above your clit, his hot breaths hitting you. "Spence... please", you moaned.

Reid pushed his fingers into you, thrusting them in and out repeatedly.

You were close when all of a sudden, he removed his fingers. "Babe, what the fuck", you said desperately.

He let out a chuckle at the word 'babe' and stared down at you, continuing his thrusting and making you come.

Deciding to be bold in the heat of the moment, you flipped him over, climbing on top.

You slowly sank down onto him. He moaned in response and put his hands around your waist, steadying you.

"So this is what we're doing now?", he smirked, kissing you deeply.

You began riding him and rubbing your clit, bringing you closer. Coming around him, he began thrusting upwards into you, trying to hit his own high.

He emptied himself inside you. Close again, you came for the third time that night. 

The two of you had talked about how you were on birth control so you weren't worried.

"Our first time as a couple", Reid said.

"Oh god shut up", you said laughing as you threw one of his pillows at him.

Giving him a quick kiss, you went to the bathroom to pee and clean yourself up.

When you came back to his room he had already changed into his pyjamas and laid out a shirt and some boxers for you to change into.

You put them on and laid next to him, pulling the blanket over yourself. He felt you next to him and wrapped his arms around you, falling back asleep afterward.

Moments later, his warmth and proximity lulled you to sleep.

The next morning you decided to wake up early and surprise him with some non-burnt breakfast. You made waffles and cut up some fruit.

Reid POV:

I woke up and noticed Y/n was no longer beside me. Walking into the kitchen, I saw her bent over the counter, eating breakfast.

"Did you make this?", I asked.

"Yep", Y/n said. "and it's not burnt either".

I chuckled and walked over to her, wrapping my arms around her and pressing a kiss on her forehead.

"Well thank you, even though you insulted my amazing cooking skills"

"I would never", she said winking.

In the middle of eating breakfast, I got a call from Garcia and walked over to my bedroom.

"Sorry to disturb your beauty sleep Boy Genius, but we have a case, Florida".

"I was already up, no need to worry Garcia. I'll head over now."

I hung up the phone and headed over to say goodbye to Y/n before I left.

"Y/n, Garcia just called me, we have a case".

"Oh...", she said. "Where is it?"

"Florida, but I don't know much yet. We usually get the case information once we're all gathered at the roundtable", I said.

"Ok well um, just be safe okay. Come back to me"

"Of course", I said, kissing her forehead and hugging her before walking out the door.

Back to Y/n POV:

You walked outside with Reid, parting your separate ways as he went to work and you went back to your apartment as work didn't start for another few hours.

You walked into your bedroom, looking for something presentable to wear to work. Your phone started buzzing, a random number had called. You decided to answer the phone.

"Did you miss me, baby? Because I've been thinking about you... a lot."

Your blood ran cold.


	8. Friends Night In

"Thomas..."  
"So you remember my name?"  
"What do you want from m-", you said as he hung up.

You were scared but it was Thomas; he had always been all talk. Brushing it off, you put on your work clothes, trying to calm yourself.

…

After a long day, you got in your car and headed home.

Your phone rang once again.

Checking the caller ID, you saw it was Luke. You breathed a sigh of relief and answered it.

"Hey Luke, long time no see", you joked.

"Y/N, my 'bestie', how have you been? Reid over here has not stopped talking about you"

"Awe, tell him I say hi and miss him. I've been good, this morning was just a little weird is all. How about you huh?"

"I'm good too, just a bit frustrated because we have no leads on this case so far."

"I'm sorry to hear that Luke. I hope you guys find a lead quickly so we can all get together soon. I will personally hunt you down if you don't. "

"Okay okay, very funny Y/N. We just got some new victims so I'm gonna have to go. But um it sounds like a plan, see you soon."

"See you soon, love you 'bestie'"

"Love you too Y/N", he said playfully rolling his eyes from the police station.

…  
Two weeks had gone by.

Luke called to let you know that the team had just gotten back. He suggested having a movie night at his apartment with Reid and Garcia as well.

Even though he had mentioned her in past conversations, you still hadn't met Garcia, so you were excited to see her.

…  
You finally got back to your apartment. Changing out of your clothes, you put on a casual outfit and called Spencer to make sure he was aware of the night's plans.

"Hey Spence, I just wanted to make sure Luke told you about tonight!"

"Tonight?"

"I told Luke to tell you but I guess he didn't. You, Penelope, and I are going to have a movie night at Luke's place."

"Ohhh alright. It sounds good. I'm almost home so I'll pick you up and we can go together"

"Okay perfect. I'm almost done getting ready so I'll let you know. Oh and please bring candy, I think I remember you having some."

"Lucky for you, I do in fact have some candy. And alright, see you in a bit."

You finished getting dressed and walked over to your living room to wait for Spencer.

He walked in a few minutes later, pulling you in for a kiss.

"How have you been my love?", he said.

"I've been alright, just working and then being home alone waiting for you to add some entertainment to my day. How about you?"

"I've also been alright. I miss you a lot too when I'm on cases. Should we go to Luke's apartment now?"

"Yeah I think we should go so that we aren't late. I'm dying to meet Garcia"

The two of you walked to the car and drove to Luke's apartment complex. You knocked on the door and were met by a cheerful blonde wearing colorful clothing. It was Garcia.

"Oh my god! It's you! Hi, I've been so excited to meet you", she said.

"Same here! Luke wouldn't stop talking about you and I knew I just had to meet you myself"

"He was huh? Ohh, come in you two! Luke's in the living room setting up the TV."

"Love I'm gonna go say hi to Luke for a second, are you okay if I go?", said Reid.

"How else are we gonna talk about you! Go boy wonder", said Garcia.

He gave you a peck on the lips and walked to the living room.

"So... how are things going with you two love birds?", she said.

"It's going well, great actually."

"Ugh yes! I love to hear it. I can just imagine the future baby geniuses"

Luke quickly walked into the room.

"Whoah whoah! Calm down. I got the TV to work so let's go pick out a movie instead of continuing this conversation", said Luke.

Spencer made eye contact with you and you both let out awkward laughs. He moved to sit next to you on the couch.

The four of you picked the movie What Happened to Monday and watched it.

Two hours had gone by and it was now 11 pm.

You were falling asleep and Spencer noticed. He woke you up and helped you to the car, letting Luke and Penelope know that you were leaving and saying a quick goodbye.

He placed you on your bed and you woke up.

"Babe... stay here with me tonight."

He gave you a small smile and curled up next to you, putting his arm around your waist.

You fell asleep soon after.


	9. Gourds

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! Thank you so much for 500 reads, I honestly didn't think that would happen. Enjoy :)

𝟑 𝐦𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐡𝐬 𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐫

It was now October and the leaves in Virginia had begun to change colors.

Spencer's birthday was soon approaching, as well as your four month anniversary.

You hadn't heard from Thomas in the months past and were glad, to say the least. Spencer never found out and you wanted to keep it that way, he didn't need something else to deal with. The phone call wasn't explicitly threatening, you thought, he wouldn't be able to do much anyway.

Sitting on your bed, stuck in your thoughts, you received a phone call.

"Lady Genius! Good morning love, I just wanted to ask if you had any plans for our boy's birthday."

"Hey Pen! I was actually just thinking about that. Want to help me?"

"Of course y/n. I can come over tonight if you want to plan"

"Perfect. Thank you so much, I'll see you soon."

You hung up the phone and opened Pinterest, searching for fall themed parties.

. . .

A few hours later, Garcia came over.

"Ok so I was thinking fall right? Pumpkins, bats, the works..."

"I was thinking the same thing sister. Reid loves Halloween so its just perfect, a match made in heaven. Sort of like you two", she said winking at me.

"So I was thinking black table cloths with little pumpkins as centerpieces", I said laughing awkwardly.

"Changing the topic I see, no worries. Your idea sounds great! Should we do it on his actual birthday?"

"Uh I think we should do it a few days before. I have a few ideas for what we're doing on his birthday, if you know what I mean"

"Y/n, you nasty girl", she said jokingly, "so how is he?"

"He's uh..."

She was interrupted by a phone call from Spencer, perfect timing.

"Hey Spence, what are you up to?"

"Hi my love, I'm just sitting here reading. How about you?", he said.

"Totally not planning your birthday with Garcia", I said laughing, "Stupid question but, you're home right."

"Yeah. Are you coming over tonight?"

"Of course love. I'll be there in a bit."

"Alright, see you soon."

You hung up the phone and walked back towards Garcia.

"Pen, Spence just called me and I should head over so he isn't suspicious about the party. I'll call you sometime this week to confirm the date."

"Of course sweetie, no worries. Send Boy Genius my love".

. . .

You locked your car door and headed into the apartment complex.

Reid opened the door and moved sit on the couch with you.

"Are you hungry?", he said.

"I'm down to eat. Chinese?"

"Sounds good. I'll order it."

The food arrived shortly after and the two of you ate, becoming increasingly tired.

"That food was so good but I'm STUFFED", you said.

"Do you wanna spend the night? We're obviously both tired."

"I was actually about to ask you that".

The two of you headed to his bedroom and quickly fell asleep.

. . .

Spencer was still asleep when you woke up. Wanting to surprise him, you ordered breakfast because, lest be honest, you weren't the best cook either.

Unlocking your phone, you searched for something to do, stumbling across a pumpkin patch. You bought two tickets and waited for him to wake up.

He woke up just as the food arrived.

"Surprise?", you said.

"Good morning? Thank you y/n you didn't have to do that."

"Shh, it's no big deal Spence. Let's go eat"

Once he finished eating, you figured it would be a good time to let him know about the pumpkin patch so he could get ready.

"So I might or might not have another surprise for you today..."

"Do tell", he said.

"No love, its a surprise. Get dressed and then I'll blindfold you until we get there."

You arrived at the pumpkin patch, Reid trailing behind you blindfolded.

Walking into the corn maze, you soon realized it was a mistake. You had to lead Spencer which inevitably lead to both of you getting lost.

"Spence", you said.

"Y/n", he replied.

"I'm going to pull off your blindfold now", you said.

He opened his eyes and smiled widely.

"Y/n! You did not to a pumpkin patch. I love it so much, thank you."

"Spencer I... I love you."

He turned back around in shock, "I love you too y/n/n"

You pulled him into a kiss and then separated, out of breath.

"That was amazing, oh wow. Do you want to get some gourds?", he said laughing.

"I would say we also need pumpkins. Halloween is around the corner after all."

"Of course. I need at least five gourds for my apartment. Did you know that pumpkins are technically considered gourds? Along with squash, pumpkins and gourds are members of the Cucurbitaceae family and gourds are divided into two categories hard and then soft skinned- pumpkins falling under that of hard-skinned gourds."

"You're so intriguing Spencer Reid, that's why I love you."

He placed another kiss on your lips.

You two then grabbed then got the gourds, placing them in your car after buying them.

He brought you back to his apartment to carve the pumpkins.

"So what did you carve?", he said.

"A bat, you?"

"Albert Einstein", he said.

"You're joking, show me"

He turned his pumpkin and sure enough there was an interesting looking Einstein on it. You loved his art style, it was unique.

"Okay but that's really good. You put my little bat to shame."

"Love, your bat is just as good and adorable"

"Whatever you say genius", you said, pulling him in for a hug.


	10. Birthday Reunion

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So yeah...

𝐀 𝐰𝐞𝐞𝐤 𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐫

After much planning, it was finally October 27th, the day of Spencer's birthday party. The entirety of the BAU was at your apartment waiting for him to get there.

"Why isn't our beloved boy genius here yet?", Garcia said, "Did he not get your texts? I see nothing saying his phone was disconnected."

"Calm down, I'm sure he's fine, just running a bit late. Right Y/N? ", Alvez responded.

"Yeah, I'm sure he's fine. I'll call him now to make sure he's on his way."

You pulled out your phone and selected Spencer's contact.

"Hi Y/N! I'm so sorry that I'm running late. I couldn't find the brand of pumpkin pancake mix you asked me for. Would you prefer if I came back and we buy it together tomorrow?"

"It's okay love don't worry. I could've sworn they had it there but I guess not, just come over soon."

"Alright, I'll see you soon Y/N. I love you."

"I love you too", you said before ending the call.

…

A bit later, Spencer called you saying he was nearby. You told everyone to hide and turned off the lights.

After hearing a knock, you opened the door to him, telling him to close his eyes until you reached the living room.

You took off his blindfold and the team jumped out yelling "surprise!"

He slightly jumped and started laughing. "What are you all doing here? Morgan?"

"You know I wouldn't miss your party pretty Ricky. So tell me about your girlfriend, Ms. Y/N", Morgan said smirking.

"Well... We met six months ago at a coffee shop while she was waiting on someone, come to find out it was Luke, her best friend. Two months later, we started dating, and now we've been dating for around four months."

"My man, I knew you had it in you", he said.

You walked back over to Spencer and Morgan.

"Hey Morgan, its great to finally get to know you. How are Savannah and Hank doing?"

"They're doing good. How's it going with pretty boy over here?"

"It's going great actually. I've never been happier", you said making eye contact with Spencer.

"Glad to hear that. I'll let you go introduce yourself to everyone."

You walked away and introduced yourself to the rest of the team, holding short conversations with them.

…

"So Alvez, what have you been up to this weekend? ", Tara said.

"I mostly just hung out with Roxy at home. How about you?"

"I actually spent some time at your mom's house. My weekend was pretty interesting."

"I really set myself up for that one didn't I", he said.

"You do it every time, without fail my friend."

You overheard their conversation and started laughing.

"Y/N, you really find this funny", he said.

"I mean... you do keep falling for it. Anyway, I just came here to tell you two that we're going to cut Spence's cake", you said.

At the table, JJ pulled a hat out of her bag and placed it on Spencer's head. He stared at you with his signature awkward smile.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I just felt like it would be the perfect time to recreate the picture of Spence with this hat on", said JJ.

You all sang "Happy Birthday" to him and then ate cake.

It soon became 10pm and everyone began heading out. He helped you finish cleaning your apartment.

"Thank you for the party love", he said.

"It was no problem", you said, "Did you like it?"

"Of course, it was nice seeing Morgan again. We should go visit sometime soon, I haven't seen Hank in a bit"

"Yeah, we definitely should visit them more but now it's time for your other birthday surprise."

You grabbed his hand and lead him into your bedroom.

*

Pulling off your shirt, you unveiled your lace undergarments. He began to kiss you, pushing you onto the bed and moving downwards as he went along. You felt his hot breaths against your core and moaned.

"Someone's eager", Spencer said.

He pulled off your underwear as well as his own.

You hopped on top of him. Teasing his tip at your entrance, you sunk down onto his length.

"Fuck", you both said simultaneously.

You rocked your hips, riding him until the both of you came.

"I'm giving you your actual gift tomorrow but your early gift is me. You can do whatever you want."

He chuckled and flipped you over, switching positions. Pinning you down, he climbed on top of of you and positioned himself. Unexpectedly, he thrusted into you, causing you to let out another moan.

He grabbed your legs and hoisted them up by his head, thrusting deeper. You could feel your high approaching. You came moments moments later and he continued his thrusts, joining you soon after.


	11. The Birthday

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! Thank you so much for reading. I forgot that I had a few more chapters written so I'm posting this now.

You got up from your bed and went to the bathroom.

Once again, you heard the familiar buzz of your cell phone- another random number. You tried to ignore it and began your walk back to Reid. The number called again. Feeling emboldened, you answered the phone.

"Hello?", you said.

"Hello kitten. I saw the despicable actions you just showed. How could you get with that poor wimpy excuse of a man? You are mine, MINE, you hear me!".

He hung up seconds later, leaving you no time to respond. You froze in place. Why would Thomas call again? It was becoming weird and rather scary the more you thought about it.

The next thing you knew, Reid was calling you from your bedroom.

"Y/N! Are you okay? You've been out of the room for a long time."

"Yeah uh I'm fine. I'll head back now, just give me a second Spence."

You stood there, calculating the possibility of things going south and if you should tell Spencer about it. A few minutes later you walked back into the room, hopping into bed next to him. It was now midnight.

"Happy birthday Spence, I love you. I'll be giving you your gift later."

"Thank you Y/N, I love you too. You didn't have to get me a gift but I'm excited to see what is."

"Of course, it's no problem love."

"You know, after all I've been through, I never thought I'd have this. I'm so thankful for you and the positive aspects you've added to my life. I feel like I should tell you this now before its too far ahead and you had no idea. Uh- almost eleven years ago I was taken by an unsub and injected with hydromorphone (Dilaudid) and developed an addiction to it but I went to NA meetings and got sober. My mother has schizophrenia and Alzheimer's and last year another unsub, Cat Adams, who had developed an obsession with me, framed me for the murder of a doctor from Mexico whom I was meeting with to get experimental medicine for my mother and I was in prison for around three months."

"Spence... I had no idea. I'm sorry you had to go through that alone but so grateful that you're still here love. How are you really? How's your mother?"

"She's in a sanitarium in Las Vegas. Her medications still aren't working which means that soon enough she won't remember anything. I'm not quite sure how I'm doing but I know that being with you makes me feel happy again, which I'm also very grateful for, as you said"

"I love you. Thank you for telling me", you said hugging him.

"I love you too y/n. We should go to sleep, it's late and I don't want us to be extremely tired on my birthday", he said laying down and wrapping his arm around your waist.

. . .

You woke up early in the morning. Spencer was still asleep, leaving you with the opportunity to surprise him with breakfast. However, you soon realized that you had no pancake mix or any of the necessary ingredients to make it by hand.

Moments later, he quietly walked into the kitchen, wrapping you in a hug.

"Spence!", you screeched, "I was going to try and surprise you but then I realized I would have to go to the store. I was about to head out actually."

"Well, I could go to the store with you to buy the ingredients. We could also make them together if you'd like."

"Are you sure? It is your birthday after all"

"Of course, I don't mind."

. . .

The two of you arrived at the store and began searching the aisles for the pancake mix. Spencer quickly found it and put it in the cart. You checked out and began the drive back.

"Your apartment or mine?", you asked.

"Mine?", he responded.

Once you arrived, he locked his door behind him helped you unpack the ingredients, placing them on the counter.

"Okay so pass me the wet ingredients and a bowl. You do the dry ingredients and we'll combine them all together."

After half an hour of chaos, the pancakes were finished and slightly burnt. You ate your pancakes and then remembered his gift.

"I almost forgot to give you your gift. Close your eyes while I go get it."

"Sure", he said somewhat confused.

Grabbing his gift from your car, you walked back out to the kitchen, placing the gift in his hands.

"Okay open your eyes now", you said.

"Y/N, you didn't have to. Thank you. I love it. Did you know that Annabel Lee was Poe's final completed poem?"

"I don't think I did actually."

"Well now you do", he said, "So what should we do today because I'm not quite sure yet."

"It's up to you love, I'm fine with doing whatever you want."

"I mean I'd prefer to relax here with you. We could watch a movie or read together."

Spencer began reading a book and you curled into his side, trying your best to read at the same pace. He saw that you had been struggling and waited for you to tell him when you had finished reading each page. You hadn't spoken in a while so he looked down and saw that you had fallen asleep. He lightly shook you awake and walked with you to your bedroom, climbing into bed.

"Love you", he said tiredly kissing you on your forehead before falling asleep himself.


	12. Halloween

It was finally Halloween, Spencer's favorite holiday. You went downstairs to his apartment in preparation for the night to come. The two of you were going to join JJ and her family in trick-or-treating.

"Hey! Are we driving over to JJs or is she coming here?", you said.

"JJs, Henry and Michael wanted to go trick or treating in their neighborhood because the candy there is better apparently"

You got in the car and arrived at JJs house 30 minutes later.

"Uncle Spence, you're finally here!", Henry said, "Who's she?"

"Hi Henry", Spencer said, "She's my girlfriend, Y/N"

"Hi, nice to meet you", Henry said.

"It's nice to meet you too. Are you excited to go trick-or-treating?"

"Of course", he said.

JJ walked outside of the house, Michael and Will alongside her.

"Hey Spence! Y/N", she said, "Are you guys ready to get going? I think Michael's gonna fall asleep soon"

"Let's go", the two of you said in unison.

The six of you spent and hour going around the neighborhood until Michael had fallen asleep. You walked into JJs house to say your goodbyes and then hopped in the car with Spencer. When you were halfway to your apartment building when you got a call from Garcia and put the phone on speaker.

"Hey lover girl! I'm here with Luke and we were wondering if you and your man would want to hang out with us tonight."

You turned towards Spencer giving him an inquisitive look.

"Sure Garcia, we'll drive there now", he said.

"Einstein! I figured you'd be there with her. Anyway, I'm glad you said yes, get here ASAP, but no rush of course"

"Alright Penny, see you soon", you said.

You soon arrived at Garcia's house.

"How are my two favorite people doing?", she said.

"I'm pretty good and I'm guessing Spencer would say he is too if he hadn't disappeared with Luke."

Garcia walked with you to the living room where Luke and Spencer were talking.

"Wow Luke, what a way to greet your bestfriend", you said jokingly as you walked in.

"Y/N, sorry, Reid and I were just talking about an old case", he said.

"It's alright. So, what did you guys want to do? I mean I could use a drink after spending most of the night with Henry and Michael. They're not bad kids but it was... a lot"

"No worries madam genius, I have some wine for these occasions", Garcia said.

"Thank you so much Pen."

As time passed by, so did the contents of the bottle of wine.

"Not to be too forward, ok I sort of am but I just need to say, you two would be such cute parents ugh. Just imagine the baby geniuses."

"Okay uh I think we should all hold off a bit on that. So how are things with the two of you?", Luke said.

"Things are going very well actually. We've been dating for almost five months now and I think I speak for the both of us when I say I'm happy", Spencer said.

You hugged him, placing a chaste kiss on his lips.

"I can't say I disagree."

𝐀 𝐅𝐞𝐰 𝐖𝐞𝐞𝐤𝐬 𝐋𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐫

It was now November, around a month away from the new year. You were sitting in your apartment, waiting for Spencer to get back from a case. Your phone began to ring, it was him.

"Hi Y/N. I'm on my way back from work and wanted to let you know that Rossi has invited us over for Thanksgiving dinner, if you want to go of course, I know being around everyone can be a bit much."

"Spence, of course I'll go with you. What time should I be ready by?"

"Well he said dinner was at 5 so I'd assume we should both be ready by 3:30 or 4 with the distance from here to his home."

"Sounds good, I'll let you go so that I can start getting ready."

After you were ready, you headed downstairs to Spencer's apartment. You sat on his couch and waited for him.

"Alright, I'm finally done. I was struggling on which color I wanted to wear so I just went with Earth tones since autumn is about to end", he said.

"Took you long enough love. You look good."

"Thank You. You look amazing as well. It seems we both decided on Earth tones, we're watching."

"Awe, we are. Time went by so fast, it's almost 4:15. I think we should start the drive to Rossi's now Spence."

The two of you got in your car and drove to Rossi's, arriving five minutes late.

"Nice of you to join us kids. I made my special carbonara as well as some of the holiday regulars", Rossi said as he opened the door.

"Hey Rossi! Sorry we're late, we lost track of time and all the sudden it was less than an hour until 5."

"Its alright bella. Everyone's in the living room. Reid, you stay here for a minute, we need to have a little conversation."

"Bye love, good luck with that", you said pacing a kiss on his cheek and walking towards the other guests.

"So kid... you two huh. Where do you see things going? A little proposal?", Rossi said.

"I uh, oh wow Rossi you caught me a bit off-guard there. I mean I do love her and see a future with her, I'm just scared. I think it's too soon."

"I get you boy wonder. Just remember, I've learned in life that waiting forever isn't always the best option. Take from that what you will and let's go out to the living room."

"Thanks Rossi."

"No problem kid."

You had been talking to Tara and Emily when you saw them walk back in.

"Okay my friends, let's all head over to the table. È ora di mangiare."

The food was amazing of course. You grew more tired as the night progressed and decided it was time to head back home. Spencer grabbed your hand and the two of you said your goodbyes, walking to the car.


	13. The Box

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading, I apologize for the following chapters but trust me its just to get somewhere.

A week had passed and it was now your six month anniversary. Spencer had called and told you to be at his apartment by 7:30 pm. You got ready and headed downstairs, excited to see what he had planned.

"Hi love, happy anniversary!", he said, pulling you into a hug.

"Happy Anniversary Spence! I can't believe that it's been six months already."

"I know, it's amazing how quickly time can pass by", he said, "Oh right, close your eyes and follow me. I'll tell you when to open them."

You grabbed his hand and let him lead you throughout his apartment until you finally came to a stop.

"Okay Y/N, you can open your eyes now."

The first thing you saw were the candles and dimmed lights, he had set up a candle-lit dinner.

"Love", you said, placing a kiss on his lips, "You didn't have to do all this. I appreciate it, thank you."

"Of course, I wouldn't want to do it for anyone else."

The two of you ate your dinner, enjoying a night full of laughter and conversation.

"So, what's for dessert", you said.

"Well I did buy a chocolate cake."

"I was sort of thinking me..."

"That's uh, that's even better."

*  
You kissed him hungrily and walked over to the fridge, grabbing the whipped cream. He wrapped his arms around you, grabbing you from behind, and pushing you on his kitchen counter.

"Someone's excited aren't we."

"I can't help it", he said, placing another kiss on your lips before grabbing the whipped cream. You laid back on the counter, waiting for him.

He put whipped cream on your chest and down your stomach, licking it off as he went along. Placing himself between your legs, he began to undress you, kissing you deeply as he did so.

"Fuck", you said.

"Who's excited now", he said smirking.

He quickly entered you but thrusted at a relatively moderate pace. This wasn't just sex, it was 'making love'. Who would've thought...

Rubbing your clit, you felt yourself getting closer and closer until you came around him. Being sent over the edge, Spencer came soon after you.  
*

"I love you", you said, "Thank you, for everything."

"I told you, it's no problem. I love you so much."

The two of you walked over to his room, getting in bed and trying to fall asleep. You couldn't shake the feeling that bad things were about to happen, something felt off. Things had been good for far too long, Thomas' period of silence becoming rather off-putting.

It took you a while to calm your mind but you eventually fell asleep, tangled up in Spencer's arms.  
. . .

𝐓𝐡𝐫𝐞𝐞 𝐖𝐞𝐞𝐤𝐬 𝐋𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐫

It was Christmas Day. You had agreed to spend the day together at Spencer's apartment. Checking the time, you saw that it was 7 am and he was still asleep. You crept out of his bedroom and into the kitchen to prepare breakfast.

A bit later he woke up confused as to why you weren't next to him but realized soon after smelling the breakfast foods.

"Good morning love", he said sleepily.

"Good morning! I assumed you'd be tired so I made you this", you said, handing him a cup of coffee.

"Thank you so much. I could barely keep my eyes open after I got out of bed."

"I could tell, and it's no problem."

You ate your breakfast, enjoying each other's company. All of the sudden you felt sick and ran to the bathroom. He followed behind you and pulled your hair back. After you were done, you cleaned yourself off and brushed your teeth.

"Are you feeling a bit better?", he said.

"A bit yeah, thank you Spence."

"Of course, do you want to open your gifts now?"

"Sure", you said, following him to his closet where the gift was hidden inside of.

"Can you turn around for a second?"

You turned around, heavily confused.

He pulled out a little box and walked back over to you.

"You can open your eyes now."

You turned around and stared at him still somewhat confused, "W-"

"It's a promise ring. I feel like it might be a bit to soon for an engagement at the moment but I just wanted to show you that I do intend on this relationship going somewhere and that I'm serious about it and about us."

"Spence I- Thank you, you're so amazing. I love it. I'm serious about this too."

You kissed and hugged each other.

"I think we should open your gifts now love, and I guess mine as well if there's any smaller gifts", you said.

"There is trust me. Of course, I'm glad we're on the same page."

He began opening his gifts but was interrupted by a phone call, it was Emily. You let out a little sigh as he walked into his bedroom.

"Hi Emily, what's going on?"

"Reid, I'm so sorry to bother you on Christmas. I know you're with Y/N but have a case, it's urgent. There's a family annihilator in California and the Unsub's timeframe between kills is shortening. Garcia will brief us on the rest in the jet."

"Alright, I'll head over soon."

He walked back out to the living room.

"Case?", you said sadly.

"There's a family annihilator in California."

"I just wanted to spend one of the few days I could with you, you're always away at work. It's a lot and today that I'm not felling too well, you can't stay with me. It honestly sucks Spence, I wish we could be together more often."

"I know love, I know. I also wish we could be together more often but this is my job, I've had it for over twelve years. I can't just miss a case every time. Look, how about when I get back we can have a talk about all of this. Does that sound good?"

"Okay love, I understand. We can talk when you get back, like you said."

He walked into his room once again to change and walked out a bit later.

"Y/N, I'm going to leave now. I hope you feel better love, I'm so sorry."

You didn't respond so he became somewhat concerned and walked over to the couch where he found you sound asleep. He placed a kiss on your forehead, pulled a blanket over you and wrote you a note for when you woke up before stepping outside and heading to the BAU.


	14. The Note

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I was going to post this chapter and then the next one later on but I decided that I would post them together once I finished chapter 15. Thank you for reading and tysm for 800 reads

You woke up to an empty apartment. Feeling hungry, you got up and went to make yourself breakfast when you saw a note on the counter.

Y/N, I'm sorry I didn't say goodbye. You were finally getting some sleep and I didn't want to wake you. I should be back by the end of the month. I love you and hope that you feel better soon. I promise I'll call you as much as I can.  
-Spencer

Reading the note, you decided to call him.

"Hey Spence, I saw your note this morning. How's the case going?"

"It's uh... it's going alright. We don't have any major leads yet but it's only been a day so that's somewhat expected. Anyway I just wanted to reiterate how sorry I am and make sure you're feeling better."

"Thank you love. You don't have to apologize, it's your job, I get it. I think I'm feeling somewhat better today."

"Of course love. I'm glad to hear you're feeling better, I was kind of worried to be honest. Prentiss just called me over, I think we have something.I'm going to have to call you back in a bit. I love you."

"No worries Spence, talk soon. Good luck on the case. I love you too."

You went on with your day and everything had been going well. That was, of course, until you found another note, this time in your apartment that you had walked back to after hanging up with Spencer and eating your breakfast.

My dearest kitten,  
Did you really think I would let you off that easily?  
I see just how much you care about our love, promising your future hand in marriage to that glue-stick you call your boyfriend, or should I say fiancé-to-be. It's clear you still haven't learned that you are MINE and mine only. We will be meeting soon, as well as that stick. Enjoy your little photoshoot by yours truly, I'll make sure it's the last time the two of you are ever together.  
-T

Frozen, the familiar feeling of nausea overwhelmed you and the room began to spin. You had been reluctant to tell Spencer about Thomas as you knew there wasn't much he could do until there was more of a direct threat in the messages. However, with his hostility and mentions of "meeting soon" you knew that you would have to tell Spencer now, before something happened. If the message wasn't enough, the hundreds of photos of you and Spencer he had left were.

Almost as if he had read your thoughts, he called you.

"Hi love, we just got back to the hotel. How did your day go? Mine was rather stressful."

"Hey Spence", you said nervously.

"What's wrong love, you've been a bit off lately? You can tell me anything."

"I uh- I don't think I told you this but I had this ex, Thomas, and he was too possessive. I couldn't be around other guys, he had to know who I was with and where I was going, I couldn't do anything without his approval. He was essentially controlling my life during the time we dated. About a year in, he had been showing signs of wanting to propose and I knew things were bad and that they would only get worse once he proposed, so I left and never looked back."

"Y/N, I had no idea. I'm so sorry. I'm glad you're telling me this and that you trust me but I'm sort of confused as to why you're mentioning him now."

"In the last few months, Thomas has been calling me. The messages weren't explicitly threatening so I assumed you couldn't do anything, which is why I didn't tell you until now. He left a note in my apartment saying that we could "meet soon" and mentioned you as well. The fact that he came into my apartment and left that message along with all those photos of us is what drove me to tell you."

"Shit Y/N, you could've told me love. I'm sure I could have tried to figure out a way to do something; nonetheless, I'm glad you told me now. I'll talk to Prentiss and explain what's going on so that the rest of the team can come and help once this case is finished. I'll get on a plane and be there as soon as I can. I love you."

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner. I love you too, see you soon Spence."

You felt rather uneasy and decided to head to the BAU in hopes that Garcia would let you spend the night there. Your apartment was the last place you wanted to be so you packed a bag and drove over. She was on her phone when you walked into her office, a look of fear on her face, so you waited for her to hang up before speaking.

"Hi Pen, I'm guessing they just told you."

"Indeed my poor lady genius. Seeing that you already have a bag, I'm assuming you want to have a sleepover. I was about to recommend it anyways, it's better for you to be here, safe, while that man is still out there looking for you and boy wonder."

"Yeah, I'm not sure what to do I'm just scared and worried about Spence. He said he'd be flying in as soon as he could."

"I'm so sorry sweets, the two of you don't deserve this. You can sleep in here with me tonight or we could go to another empty office."

"I think your office, it's much more cheerful in there and I could use that right now."

"Of course of course. It's getting late so I think you should get some sleep. Sweet dreams."

"Sweet dreams Pen, good night."

It was now morning and you were awoken by a frantic Penelope.

"Y/N, Y/N! Please wake up, I think somethings happened."

"Pen it's too early in the morning for this, I'm safe at the BAU so can we go back to sleep please."

"My love, it's not you we're worried about. Have you heard from boy genius?"

"Not yet why?"

Penelope turned on her computer and began typing away before she turned to you, tears forming in her eyes.

"Y/N I-"


	15. The Hospital

"Y/N I-"  
—————————————————————————  
"I think you need to see this", she said.

You walked a few steps over to her desk, still somewhat sleepy when you read the headline.

Plane Crash Just Outside of Virginia Leaving Hundreds Injured, Near Death

"No- Please tell me that's not Spencer's flight."

Penelope stared down at her lap in a solemn moment.

"Penelope please!", you said tearing up.

"I'm so sorry, so sorry", she said crying.

She held you as you cried and then walked over to her computer to get more information and call the team.

"Y/N, Emily just called and told me that he was airlifted to a local hospital. We can head there now if you're up to it."

"Sure, just let me get dressed quickly."

The two of you drove to the hospital in silence, not knowing what to expect or feel in terms of Spencer's condition.

"We're here! How is he?", Garcia said walking quickly into the waiting room with you.

"They just rushed him in. I'm not sure but I don't think it's looking too good. I'm sorry Y/N", Emily said.

You nodded at her and sat down, staring down at the hospital floor, your mind completely blank.

Penelope tapped you once again, bringing you back to reality. JJ was walking towards you and the team, a sad expression upon her face.

"I just talked to the doctor, he uh- he didn't make it. God, I'm so sorry. If you need anything please let me know."

"Why do the worst things always happen to the best people, it's not fair", Penelope said trying to hold back her tears.

You felt your senses drift away, all you saw was darkness. Moments later you woke up, your body splayed across an exam table.

"What happened I- Is this real?", you said hoping otherwise.

"I'm sorry my love. We'll get through this together, I promise. There's a doctor here to check on you since you fainted", Penelope said.

The doctor introduced themself and began asking you questions.

"Have you had any prior history of fainting?"

"No, this is the first time."

"I see, it's understandable with everything you've just gone through. Extreme levels of stress can lead to fainting. It seems you are fine but we can do further tests if you feel as such."

"I think I'm fine. Thank you. Pen, can we go see him now."

"Of course sweet, we'll go now. Thank you doc."

You walked into his hospital room, staring down at the man you once thought you'd have everything with. The two of you had planned on eventually getting married and discussed having kids, you knew he wanted them. Now, however, you felt lost in life, knowing that neither of these things would be able to happen, your future plans thrown off track.

"I'm so sorry for getting mad at you the day you left. I was just feeling bad and I was in a bad mood because of it. I shouldn't have left things like that but now here we are. I love you so much."

You finished saying your goodbyes to him and walked into the hallway crying when Penelope found you.

"Y/N, you look exhausted. Lets get you home to pack some more stuff for your stay at the BAU. I can spend the night with you again if you need."

"Okay", you said slowly lifting yourself up from the floor.

A few hours had gone by and you were laying on a couch in the BAU, staring up at the ceiling while Penelope had fallen asleep. You get up and walked to the bathroom, standing in front of the sink and letting your mind wander.

. . .

Getting up to add more sugar into your coffee, you almost bump into someone. "I'm so sorry!", the tall stranger with wavy brown hair said frantically. "Did I spill any coffee on you?".

"No you're good don't worry", you smiled at him. "I haven't seen you before and I come here every week, what's your name?".

"It's Spencer", he said smiling back. "And yours?"

"Y/n".

. . .

"Remember when Luke asked how we knew each other and you said I was your boyfriend? I might have liked the sound of that and was wondering if you would want to be my girlfriend."

"Don't doubt yourself Spencer, of course I would want to", you said kissing him on the lips.

. . .

He pulled out a little box and walked back over to you.

"You can open your eyes now."

You turned around and stared at him still somewhat confused, "W-"

"It's a promise ring. I feel like it might be a bit to soon for an engagement at the moment but I just wanted to show you that I do intend on this relationship going somewhere and that I'm serious about it and about us."

"Spence I- Thank you, you're so amazing. I love it. I'm serious about this too."

. . .

You stared into the mirror and saw yourself crying. After coming back into focus, you felt tired and went back to the office after calming down, Garcia sleeping next to you. You knew there was a lot left to do but you couldn't deal with it all in one day. Soon after, you fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry, just trust me please. This was the first part of the fic that I had conceptualized and I was trying to quickly get to it without lessening quality as much as I could, so I'm sorry if it seemed rushed. I apologize if this impacted your valentines day but today was the only day that I had time to write. As always, thank you for reading <3


	16. The Funeral

Five days had gone by, it was now the day of Spencer's funeral. You were feeling nauseous, a feeling you had grown accustomed to in the last few weeks. Most of your time had been spent in his old apartment, packing up his things and sleeping in his bed. You had yet to receive any more correspondence from Thomas, which you were somewhat grateful for as you knew you wouldn't be able to handle it at the moment. In the middle of getting ready, you got a call from Luke.

"Hi Y/N. I just wanted to call and let you know to meet us at the funeral home by 8 am, the whole team's going to be there."

"Hey Luke, I'll be over there soon. I'm almost done getting dressed", you said, hanging up shortly after.

You finished getting ready and got into your car, driving to the funeral home. Luke was right, the whole team was there to pay their respects, members past and present. They all talked to you and gave their condolences. You saw Morgan and Savannah in the distance, Morgan hugging Penelope as she broke into tears. He walked up to you.

"Hey", he said tapping you on the shoulder.

"Hi Derek. How's Hank doing?"

"He's doing pretty good but what we should focus on right now is you. How are you doing with all of this?"

"I'm as good as you could expect me to be I guess. I haven't heard anything from Thomas since Spencer died which is making me feel even worse, it's like that was what Thomas had wanted all along and now that's its finally happened I don't know what to do. I stopped getting threats from him but at what cost, the love of my life is also dead, even if it wasn't directly Thomas' fault or mine."

"Y/N, don't think like that. Pretty boy wouldn't want you blaming yourself, this is in no way your fault, trust me."

"Thanks Derek. Excuse me, I have to go. I'll be right back."

You rushed into the bathroom, the feeling of nausea overwhelming you once again. After puking, you exited the stall and were met by a tall woman with brown hair.

"Hey, are you okay?"

"Yeah sorry. I've been feeling really bad lately, I think it's just the stress from everything going on right now."

She stared and you and gave a knowing nod.

"I'm Elle Greenaway, an old teammate of Spencer's. He was a really good guy, always checking up on me after cases when I wasn't doing too well. I'm sorry for your loss Y/N."

"So you're the Elle he'd spoken about before. It's nice to finally put a face to the name. How long are you going to be in town? I'd love to learn more about your time together on the team."

"I am, thanks. I'm sorry, I actually have to leave right now. I don't know how kindly the team would take to seeing me again. It was nice meeting you, I'm sure you'll be a great mother."

You stood there in shock, the woman you had met moments prior, making such a stark assumption. A few seconds later, you came back to focus once again and walked outside of the bathroom. His current teammates and you drove together to the cemetery for Spencer's burial, the others following behind.

You exited the car and stood outside with everyone as they said their words about him. It felt as if you had already said all that you needed to when you said your goodbye. You placed your rose on top of the casket, whispering a silent, "I love you" before it was lowered into the ground. The moment was surreal, it was something you had never expected to happen, at least not in the way it did, knowing the dangers of his job.

. . .

"Y/N... Y/N!", Luke said.

"Sorry, I must've zoned out. What's up?"

"It's time to go home. Penelope and I can stay with you tonight if you'd like."

"Sure, thank you Luke."

"Of course, let me know if there's anything else."

"Sure. Actually, can we stop by the pharmacy for a second on the way to the apartment?"

"Yeah, that's no problem."

The three of you left the cemetery and arrived at your apartment a bit later after leaving the pharmacy. After hearing what Elle had said, you decided to buy a few pregnancy tests. Her words could have some truth to them, you had been feeling nauseous and your period was late. You took two tests and sat them down on the sink counter, waiting three minutes as recommended by the box.

The timer went off and you opened your eyes.

Positive

Both tests confirmed Elle's suspicions, you were pregnant. You sank down onto the bathroom floor and began crying. The last piece of Spencer you had was his child, one you weren't even sure you could raise on your own. When you saw yourself having kids you had imagined him by your side helping you but here you were, without him.

Penelope had heard you cry and walked into the bathroom.

"Sweetie, what's wrong? Are you okay?"

You pointed at the test, continuing to cry.

"I took that a few minutes ago", you said.

"Oh sweets, I'm so sorry that happened now. Do you think you're going to keep it?"

"I think so, yeah. I'm really scared but I don't think I want to give up this last piece of him."

"I get you. I'll always be here if you need help or want someone to babysit or just want someone to talk to, okay. I'll even rope in Luke so that you can see your best friend more often. Speaking of Luke, are you going to tell him too?"

"Thank you so much Pen. I think I'll tell Luke once more time has passed and I've already gone to a doctors appointment or two."

"Of course sweets. I'd like to join you for that if you'd have me."

"Of course Pen, thank you again, seriously."

The two of you hugged and then walked out to the living room.

. . .  
𝐀 𝐅𝐞𝐰 𝐖𝐞𝐞𝐤𝐬 𝐋𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐫

It was the day of your doctors appointment and Penelope was there with you for it. You were nervous but somewhat excited.

"How are you feeling right now?", she said.

"I'm not really sure but I'm fine, don't worry Pen."

The doctor came in and performed the ultrasound.

"You seem to be around 7 weeks. Everything looks good, I'll give you the sonogram photos once they print out. Any questions?"

You had still been staring at the screen in silence.

"Sorry. No, I don't think I have any. Thank you doctor."

Penelope and you got in the car, driving back to your apartment where Luke was waiting for the two of you. You were going to tell him, Luke was your best friend and you began to feel like you had kept it from him for too long.

"Y/N, Penelope! You're finally back. What took the two of you so long, is everything okay?", he said.

"Yeah um, sit down for a second Luke. I have something to tell you."

"Sure."

"We were at a doctors appointment."

He stared at you with a look of confusion upon his face.

"Okay?"

"I'm pregnant, 7 weeks."

"Are you serious? Y/N come here, congratulations."

You walked towards him and he enveloped you in a hug.

"Well that explains why you were feeling off. I was gonna suggest it but I felt bad saying it."

"It's fine but yeah, here we are. It seems like some kind of joke you know what I mean, that it happened now."

"I get you. However, as I'm sure she already mentioned, you have Penelope and I here to help you with anything you need or want, we promise."

"Thank you so much. I don't deserve you two."

. . .  
You were now 20 weeks, midway through the pregnancy. Penelope came with you as usual when she had no cases to work on.

"The baby's going to be here in four months, I can't believe it. I'm gonna be the best godmother. I- No pressure to pick me of course", she said.

"Sure Pen, no pressure", you said laughing.

The doctor walked in and began the ultrasound.

"Twenty weeks now, how are you feeling?"

"I don't have morning sickness anymore so I'm good."

"That's great to hear. Ok so everything here, including measurements looks as it should be. Hold on..."

"What's wrong doctor?"

"I couldn't see it in past ultrasounds but you're pregnant with twins."

"Twins?"

"It's fairly common for the other twin to be hiding during earlier scans. I can tell you their sex now if you'd like."

"Of course, yes!", Penelope shrieked.

"Ms. Y/L/N, it appears you're having two girls."

"Oh wow, I-"

"I understand this can be very surprising, it's best to take things one step at a time. I'll give you their photos now."

. . .  
You were now back home, in bed and thinking about life. Thinking about everything that had brought you up to this point. Placing your hand over your stomach, you fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for 900 reads! I apologize if this chapter is worse than usual as my beta reader was busy this weekend but I still wanted to get this chapter out as soon as I could. The next chapter will hopefully be better as I already have it outlined.


	17. The Move

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for 1000 hits I-

Two months had gone by and you were standing inside your new apartment. Your old apartment was too small to happily fit you and the twins so you planned ahead and decided to find a new one near the school JJ's kids went to. Spencer's team was helping you move in, carrying in your possessions and those that would soon belong to the twins.

Once you were fully moved in, everyone came into the living room.

"Thank you so much. Do all of you want lunch? It'll be my treat", you said.

"Nonsense bella, I can make us all lunch. However, I might need someone to go out and buy me a few ingredients first", said Rossi.

Luke and Matt agreed to go buy the remaining ingredients while you helped Rossi prep those you already had. They came back half an hour later and Rossi began to cook.

You walked over to the couch where the rest of the team was.

"Hey sweets, how are my favorite girls doing?", Penelope said.

"Hey Pen, we're doing pretty good. I'm 30 weeks now so we're 3/4 of the way there. I'm a bit scared but I know I've got you guys so I'm feeling a bit better about everything."

"Of course, you got this!"

"So Y/N, any ideas on their names?", Tara said.

"I actually do. I'm keeping it a secret until they're born though. Like Fort Knox, I won't say anything because it'll be fun to surprise all of you."

"A surprise? I love surprises! I'm kind of sad you won't tell me my godchildren's names but it's fine, no worries cutie", Penelope said.

"Kids, enough of the chitchat, I just finished cooking and we don't want this perfect meal to go to waste do we", Rossi said.

You all ate your food and later said your goodbyes.

. . .  
Nine Weeks Later

The twins' due date was fast approaching. They could be born any day now so Penelope had been staying with you as a precaution.

Luke had wanted to hang out so he brought over a pizza. The three of you ate as you played your favorite movie.

"Y/N, can I stay over tonight with you and Penelope?", he said.

"Of course 'bestie', you don't have to ask Luke."

"So I see we're back to the bestie calling, okay then. I will find something to annoy you back with, trust me", he said chuckling.

"Yeah uh have fun with that. I'm going to go to bed before I fall asleep right here. Goodnight Pen and Luke."

. . .  
You woke up in the middle of the night, feeling sharp cramp like pains. Just in case, you walked over to Penelope and Luke, a fluid trickling down your legs as you did so.

"Y/N, it's four in the morning. Please let me go back go sleep, you should too", said Penelope as she pulled off her eye mask.

"That's kind of hard to do when I'm going into labor Penelope, my water just broke."

"Labor!?", Luke said.

"Yeah, we should kind of be leaving now."

"Ahh! It's baby time!", Penelope shrieked.

. . .  
After a relatively average length labor, you gave birth two your two daughters, Sydney Gideon Reid and Spencer Florence Reid. The team visited and met the babies, Penelope, Luke, and JJ staying behind as you had asked.

"So, I've kept the three of you here because I have an important question to ask. Penelope, we've grown super close in the last year. JJ, both of your boys were Spence's godsons and you're a great mother to them. Luke, you are and always have been my 'bestie'. Will you three be their godparents?"

"Yes!", they all said in unison.

Luke and Penelope each grabbed a twin, JJ walking towards you.

"The twins are beautiful Y/N. How are you feeling?"

"I've been better. I'm really tired but I'm glad that they're finally here though, it took long enough", you joked.

"I get you, trust me. Just wait until they can walk."

"Oh god. Either of you want to trade off a baby with JJ?"

"Sure, here you go JJ", Luke said.

. . .  
**  
Back in your bedroom, you saw Spencer standing at a distance. You walked towards towards the kitchen where he was moments earlier.

"Spencer, is it really you?", you said hugging him tightly and kissing him desperately, confusion written upon your face.

"Of course it is Y/N. Are you feeling okay?"

"Yeah I uh- Never mind sorry. What are you up to?"

"I was making you breakfast love, come sit down please."

"Thank you love, you didn't have to."

"Of course. Let's eat, I want to do something with you afterwards."

"Sure."

The two of you ate your breakfast, mainly in silence. Spencer left the room to grab something. He came back with a vinyl and placed it on a turntable near his bookshelves. Grabbing your hand, he lead you over. You went to put your arm around him when all of the sudden, you felt yourself being dragged backwards.

You had woke up

You began crying, feeling stupid for having believed the dream could've been true and that your current life was a nightmare of some sort.

A loud cry sprung out across your "new" apartment, Sydney had woken up. Moments later, Spencer began crying as well after hearing her sister's cries. Walking into the twins' nursery, you grabbed both twins and cried with them. You put Spencer down and fed Sydney before picking her up and doing the same.

The twins eventually stopped crying and fell asleep, you going to your bed to do the same.

. . .  
Two Years Later

Spencer and Sydney were almost three years old and it was their father's birthday. Now that they were at an age where they can understand most of what is said to them, you wanted to tell them more about him and take them to the cemetery. You pulled out a photo of Spencer from your phone and showed it to them.

"Girls do you remember how I had told you about your dad?"

"Little bit", Sydney said.

"Okay well let's talk about him again then my loves. Your dad and I loved each other very much and one day he was coming home but he didn't make it. Even though he hasn't met you, I'm sure he loves you very much and is watching over you. His name was Spencer, like you, because you were named after him. Sydney, you got your middle name from his friend Jason Gideon."

The twins gazes were fixated on the photo of their father, staring back up at you moments later.

"Okay girls let's get in the car. We're going to visit your dad."

The three of you got out of the car and up to his gravestone.

"Hey Spence, it's me. I'm sorry I haven't been back in a while, it's pretty hard managing your little geniuses over here."

The twins stared at you in confusion, wondering why you were speaking to what they assumed was no one.

"Sometimes, after we lose someone, it's nice to talk to them when visiting them at the cemetery. You catch them up on your life and say you love them, even though they might not hear you."

"Anyway uh happy birthday Spence, I love you. I have to go now since it's about to be their nap time."

. . .  
A few hours had gone by and the twins would soon be waking up. You walked into the kitchen to start preparing dinner when you found a note on the counter.

Hello Kitten,  
You probably thought I had forgotten about you huh. I was content knowing you no longer had the stick with you but then I found out something even worse, you had his children. I don't usually go after kids so I tried to calm myself down in the last two year but they are a piece of him, they look like him, and YOU had them. This simply will not do. We will meet one final time my pet.

-T

You froze, that feeling of fear hitting you once again as it did the morning before Spencer's death. Thomas had stopped his correspondence afterwards which made you think you were safe. However, today's letter proved you very wrong.

Focusing on the twins' safety, you called Garcia and told her you would be driving to the BAU soon. You explained the entire situation to her and the team and she told you that the three of you would be staying in the BAU. So many details were similar to those of that day, it was like reliving it all over again.

. . .  
It was now morning. Exiting the office with Spencer and Sydney, you went to grab some breakfast-like snacks and then coffee for you.

"Mommy?", Spencer said pulling at your pant leg.

"Yes my love?", you said looking up at her from your coffee cup.

"Daddy's here?"

"My love, what do you mean 'daddy's here'?"

She stared at you with a slightly annoyed face, as if your confusion was unwarranted. You turned around and sure enough, there he was. The two of you made eye contact, exchanging faces of shock.

"Spencer I-"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahh I'm sorry for the sad scenes, I had them planned for a while and it worked out because I was trying to feel something as I wrote it. Anyway I'm sorry if this feels too randomly chunked together, I was trying to bring Reid back ASAP as he's the reason we're all here lol.


End file.
